it smells like autumn

My apartment smells like autumn. I love it. I have three candles lit right now: Hallmark's Spiced Cider, a Yankee Autumn Wreath, and the most fabulous thing ever: a Woodwick Candle in Pumpkin Butter. It has a wooden wick, hence the name, so it sounds like a fire in a fireplace. It's pretty sweet. So, I've got candles lit and I'm sitting here in my living room listening to Damien Rice's "O." I love this CD. I love that it is full of strings. I also love Lisa's harmonies. Of course, that always makes me want to sing. *sigh* It feels like autumn outside too. Karis and I have talked several times about how much we love autumn. I don't know if it's because I'm a November birthday or what, but it is definitely my favorite time of the year. I miss living where there was at least some idea that it was October.

Emileigh and James are up in Wisconsin. Alison's family is down and they all went to Pompano Beach. That leaves me all alone. It's kinda nice. I'm not going to lie. I wouldn't be sitting in a dark apartment with candles lit and Damien singing to me if anyone else was here. Now all I need is some coffee. I did have some today, though. I ran up to Mitchell's and was almost late for work. Ok, actually I WAS late for work: 4 minutes. I also drank the entire 16 oz cup in the 10 minutes that it took me to get from downtown to the mall. That's right; I am officially becoming a coffee junkie. Lorelei would be proud of me. "Coffee, coffee, coffee!"

Well, I think I might actually go to bed at a decent time. Or at least do some reading or something. I'm still trying to finish: "Through Painted Deserts : Light, God, and Beauty on the Open Road" by Don Miller. I have a hard time reading that book because it makes me want to get in a car and just drive off. I love that and hate that. That's life, I guess.

really random

A few random thoughts and observations...

If it weren't for Strawberry Pop-Tarts, I would probably starve. I really like coffee and have probably had more in the last few weeks than in the two months prior. I am making more friends and doing more fun things than I think I did when I was in college. (Which is weird...am I that much more confident in myself now? 'Cause I don't feel like I am!) I really want to play music and/or sing more often. I need more sleep. I love my new friend! (you know who you are...) And now I have to go to Orlando to see the fam...

Grace & Peace!

doubting thomas

I love this song. I've been listening to it a lot lately. Yes, I'm doing the "one-song-on-repeat" thing again. It's from Nickel Creek's album "Why Should The Fire Die", which is absolutely fabulous! If you don't have it, you should get it.

what will be left when i've drawn my last breath
besides the folks i've met and the folks who know me?
will i discover a soul-saving love
or just the dirt above and below me?

i'm a doubting thomas
i took a promise
but i do not feel safe
...oh me of little faith.

sometimes i pray for a slap in the face
then i beg to be spared 'cause i'm a coward
if there's a master of death,
i bet he's holding his breath
as i show the blind and tell the deaf about his power

i'm a doubting thomas
i can't keep my promises
'cause i don't know what's safe
...oh me of little faith.

can i be used to help others find truth
when i'm scared i'll find proof that it's a lie?
can i be lead down the trail dropping bread crumbs
to prove i'm not ready to die?

please give me time to decipher the signs
please forgive me for time that i've wasted

i'm a doubting thomas
i'll take your promise
though i know nothing's safe
...oh me of little faith.

There are just so many things that are so true in here. In the sermon last week, the pastor talked about how if we were doing good, but not in the name of Jesus, we were essentially helping the cause of the Enemy. He said that Satan is not "pro-Satan", but rather "anti-Christ". He'll do anything to keep us from bringing our focus back to Christ. I love the line "if there's a master of death i bet he's holding his breath as i show the blind and tell the deaf about his power". I think that's what got me to put it on repeat in the first place and now I'm just in love with the song. Just thought I'd share. I'm off to get ready for work now. Have a beautiful day!

Finally!

Well, folks, I finally did it. I played at Open Mic Night tonight at Black and Brew. I almost chickened out, but I had already told people and they were actually going to come and hear me play. 5 people from my Bible Study came out and one person brought a friend. Lisa & Omar, Kim & Chris, and Yadira & her friend, Karen, all came (Chad, Yadira's husband was at baseball). It was fun! Very nerve-wracking, but fun! I did 3 songs: "Clay & Water" by Margaret Becker (shout out to Roz!), which I have practiced for 4 and 1/2 years and have never played outside my room, "Peace Child" by my good friend, Erik Wieder (that's right Lynchpyn fans...I'm sure you remember this song! And of course, you know this one too, Dan!), and "I Hope You Dance" by LeeAnn Womack. I did ok. There were some wrong chords and wrong words, but in all it went alright. I think that the biggest thing for me was that my friends actually showed up to hear me. Granted, I talked Omar into playing a few songs as well, but they were going to be there regardless. (By the way...Marissa actually booked Omar for a spot on Friday, March 31st!!) When I played last year with the band over at Jammin' For Jesus, my parents, the girls that worked at the shop, and like maybe 5 other people were there. And the 5 people were the other bands playing that night. It was pretty sad. The fact that I have people who are willing to support me is huge. I was kinda bummed that my roommates weren't going to come, but when I saw everyone else there on the couches, it made it a little easier. I need to keep doing this so that it gets easier. My stomach was in knots the entire time. I'm sure that the more I do it, the less the knots will take over. At least I hope so. Well, I suppose I'm done for the night. I've already done quite a bit of rambling. Until next time...

Grace & Peace!